We have been in Grand Rapids for over two years now. We bought a house and have called it home.

A couple of months ago we faced the very real possibility of moving. It has not all been roses here but I do like it and maybe most important; I am here and I do not want to move again. I am sick of moving, of changing, adapting, of packing and I just want to stay where I am at.

I have awesome friends here. A friend I can talk to about anything. Many of the woman here serve and follow God in ways that society find strange. People who have helped us when we needed it and women I actually trust with my kids. Women who do foster care and home births.  I rarely hear negative things said about anyone!  

I love that about many of the people here and yet I desperately want to stay whether God wants me to stay or go.  I have been trying to detach. I have avoided prayer. I want to be here and I am dreadfully afraid that if I go to God He will tell me that I need to follow Him wherever HE desires.  I do not want to hear that right now. I want to stay in this wonderful, small and perfectly unique town. Honestly I know that we have to go, but I do not have to be happy about it. So has been my philosophy.

Yesterday it truly hit home the reality of what is ahead. One of my daycare families found another provider. Today was my last day with them and I wanted to tell them I was kidding about moving and to see them next week. I love these kids and they are awesome. They sit with my little boy when he is sad and they let him choose the movie because he tripped and was hurt. A little girl that comes over to my little boy and encourage him to do the right thing rather than tattle on him. They are some of the kindest, fun, most awesome kids I have ever had the privilege of knowing. I actually feel guilty for accepting money from them, and my other daycare families, because well I actually love the kids being here. My son has other awesome friends that he loves and we love them.

Kids that tell me we are the best neighbors ever and kids that cuddle on my lap the entire day because they miss their mom. Kids that play superheros and swords and understand my little boys imagination perfectly. Kids with moms that are absolutely awesome and playdates are the highlights of my week. I know that I have not used the word awesome sparingly but it fits the descriptions perfectly in this situation.

Of course there are good people everywhere and truly we do not have much to complain about. We have always had enough and abundantly more.  My family has a camper near by so we may even be able to come back to visit here. The town we are looking at is beautiful. We will be closer to family so that will be awesome. My boys will have grandparents and aunts uncles nearby and in time they will have friends there too.

I also did learn a lot from my time here. I learned to research before I trust and that maybe fluoride is not as awesome as I thought it was. I learned how to eat healthier and cleaner. I learned more about essential oils and I learned how easy it is to make homemade sunblock and bug spray. I even decided that I love the farmers market!  I realized the things I learned from my mom and the things that don’t work for us that I thought I would definitely do. I learned to relax and sometimes wear mismatched socks. I learned that used is sometimes better than nothing. I became involved in my first church as an adult and was able to serve and create friendships there. I found out that I actually can handle having seven kids under one roof and not only survive but actually enjoy it.

We saw many awesome examples of good marriages and good parents. I hope that we were a positive influence on a few people as well. My perspective on life has changed drastically since the day we moved here and I believe I am wiser for it.

So cheers to life and moving where it takes you. To having three healthy boys and family and the chance to spend over two awesome years here. Surely there will be more people, more experiences, and more learning as we take this next step in our journey.